SINGAPORE - Parents who escalate school issues unnecessarily and overstep boundaries with teachers are a minority, but they waste time and divert resources away from the wider school community, said Education Minister Chan Chun Sing.
They write to the media, the prime minister, even the Corrupt Practices Investigation Bureau; one turned up at his Meet-the-People session, others have sent lawyer's letters to air their grievances. Some parents will do all this to get their way, said the minister on Sept 20.
He stressed that the majority of parents are supportive of teachers and educators. But he said that the "small number" of parents who go overboard has a "disproportionate effect because they deprive the other parents of the time that the educators would want to spend with the kids".
Mr Chan was on The Usual Place, a podcast by The Straits Times, to talk about why he recently highlighted the need to establish guidelines on how parents communicate with teachers. Also weighing in on the issue and bringing his perspective as a father of two was Straits Times editor Jaime Ho.
Bypassing the school's leadership, and instead getting a minister to bring pressure on the school, is something that Mr Chan said he "cannot tolerate".
"I trust my principals, I trust my teachers. I always tell them that I'm not going to respond to this, because the more I respond to this, the more emboldened that individual will be to bypass (the system)," he said.
"Everybody will feel that - in order to get my way, I will have to do all this. The system will eventually break down, and (then) everyone loses. So for that very small number of parents, what they are doing is most unfair to the other parents and children."
At the Ministry of Education (MOE) Schools Work Plan Seminar on Sept 18, Mr Chan said that teachers are not required to share their personal phone numbers, and do not need to respond to work-related messages after school hours.
Official channels such as e-mail and office numbers should be used when contacting parents, and teachers should respond to work-related messages after school hours only in the event of emergencies, he said.
Teachers are not 'service providers'
Parents should see themselves as partners with their child's teachers, said Mr Chan, rather than assume a transactional relationship with expectations and demands, as they would with a service provider.
Beyond creating entitled children or parents, he said such a mindset would have serious implications for the teaching profession.
"Who will want to be a teacher?" asked Mr Chan.
He pointed out that the Organisation for Economic Cooperation and Development has done studies among its members on the quality of education, and found that it was not pay, infrastructure or class size that matters most.
The most important thing was the quality of the teachers, said Mr Chan.
"If you can't get quality teachers, your entire education system will collapse - no matter how good the policies are."
Mr Ho asked if there has been a tipping point where the minister felt that the demands on teachers now have affected recruitment.
Mr Chan said that Singapore has not reached that stage yet, but he was worried by examples in other countries, where teachers have been driven to suicide or have resigned because they do not want to deal with the pressures of the job.
However, while it may not be a "big problem" here, Mr Chan said he wanted to make sure the situation does not grow "because this kind of thing is quite insidious".
"Once it's seeped into our societal culture, then we are gone. What I always jealously guard is this sense of respect, to honour our teachers because they take care of our children."
Why do parents behave this way?
Mr Chan said that perhaps now parents have a "natural tendency" to want to do more for their children, whereas in the past, parents "generally trust the teachers more".
He added: "Today, I think a lot of people feel that, 'Well, I'm also highly educated, then I should have a view on certain things.'"
However, if parents keep bailing their children out of situations, such as asking for a spelling list on their behalf or to review their PSLE scores, children will not be encouraged to be responsible or learn life skills.
He said: "That's why at MOE, we believe that we don't have to overly protect, overly structure, overly provide for our kids, and try to remove all uncertainty and untidiness (in life).
"Sometimes in trying to solve every problem for them, we actually deprive them of that learning opportunity."
He called on parents to nurture disciplined, self-reliant children in the long term.
Mr Chan said: "Sometimes as parents, we just look at the short-term performance outcome without understanding that we might inevitably breed a 'crutch mentality' in our kids to think that whenever something happens, somebody must be responsible for what is happening."?
Best gift for teachers: Respect and trust
Teachers need the space and time to focus on helping their students realise their potential, and understand their strengths and weaknesses. This is the ethos that society needs to continue to help teachers with, said Mr Chan.
He shared how, growing up, he would be warned by his mother not to have his teacher call her, or he would be in trouble. If every parent calls the teacher about their child, they would not be doing their best for the children, said Mr Chan.
"Then they will get burned out quite soon. So I think we support our teachers by respecting them, and giving them the trust, time and space to do the best things they can for our kids."
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Mr Ho asked Mr Chan about how his personal experience with his teachers growing up had shaped the way he thinks about the education service now.
The minister said that a common theme in his school years was his teachers giving him the chance to gain confidence.
A surprise mathematics test in secondary school had Mr Chan and his peers struggling, but the teacher wanted to make the point that every student had the knowledge to take the test without mugging for it. Later, she nominated Mr Chan to participate in the Mathematical Olympiad. "Suddenly, it gives you confidence that there's something in you. It tells me that teachers are constantly looking for opportunities to affirm the kids for what they can do, rather than what they cannot."
This article was first published in The Straits Times. Permission required for reproduction.